The past few days I’ve been listening to some podcasts and interviews and watching videos on various topics I have all culminated into this whirlpool of ideas that I don’t know what to do or where to go with. Even shows as comedic and trivial as The Great has given me things to think about. And I know that I’m onto something that will help me grow and mature as a person, something that’ll be important for my writing; and something that I want to talk to other people about. I think because I have been away from friends and had to make new friends and rebuild my life currently it’s become more important to me to have a conversation. I want to write all the more.
I have so many thoughts on motherhood and parenthood, so many thoughts on relationship and intentional relationships, I have so many thoughts on writing in history and what is important to me but I don’t yet know where those thoughts are going. But I want to be open to change into evolution.
The past year of my life has been one of massive changes and growth and there has been a lot of things that I’ve been thinking about, and a lot of things that I’ve wanted to think about, and write about. I still have more deconstructing to do. In the back of my head, I already knew this. I felt stagnant, but I wasn’t sure where to go next.
I watched an interview with Amanda Palmer this week and it got me thinking about how we heal through conversation with others and open dialogue, and I think that going forward talking more about my life will bring so much healing to me. And hopefully, also bring a sense of community that I feel like I’m lacking currently.
I’ve always tried my best to be honest with the writings that I share on the internet. When I first started this blog I was a Christian specifically a Catholic missionary, and over time I left the Church and came out as clear specifically bisexual and polyamorous. Since then I have continued to change, currently wrestling with gender identity and what it means to be a parent. There are still so many ways that I can change and I feel like talking about them will help me along the way.
So where do I go from here? I want to focus on writing that inspires me. I’m going to write a few more reviews and finish up the requests I have from Netgalley, but other than that I’m going to be cutting back on book reviews. Instead, I want to do weekly posts about what’s been inspiring me, from interviews to podcasts, to maybe sometimes books. I’m also going to be closing down my Patreon. I will keep it up so people can still read the unlocked posts, but it’s just been too stressful to keep up with, plus since the pandemic started I lost all my patrons save one (which was my parents, love you!).
I don’t want to stress to put out ”content”, I just want to focus on what makes me happy and interests me, and share it with the hopes of having a conversation with others.